Phobiaphobia

The fear of death, arachnophobia
the fear of falling off the edge
of life, the threatening spectre
only you, left on your own to hedge
the demons dancing on your shoulder
weighed down by stomach muscle spasm
at sight of such amazing speed
of hairy beast so very small; that chasm
into which you fall, that’s bottomless,
and will never have a safety net
to rest you from eternity of black
and no way back, drowning, wet,
unprotected from the howling wind
sent by a solar storm, whose heat explodes,
our planet earth, a tiny speck of dust
for which all life, both great and small implodes.
 
And yet, we found our art and came to be
so fearful of the Gods, whom we revere
just so as to fool ourselves that we
will always have control and never fear
– that fear that drives us out of dread, and
makes us rise from bed each day
as slaves, not masters, with disabled minds
for which a simple beauty once held sway.

© 2012 John Anstie

[This was written as a contribution to ‘Poeticaphobia’ at dVerse Poets Pub, hosted this week by our friend Stuart McPherson, on the subject of fear and phobias!]

About PoetJanstie

“Life is short and art long, the crisis fleeting, experience penniless and decision difficult” ~ Hippocrates. As a young man, John was sporting and fit. It was then as much his recreational therapy as a cappella harmony singing, music, walking in the hills and writing is now. Playing Rugby Union for over twenty years, encouraged in the early days by a school that was run on the same lines and ethos as that famous Scottish public school, Gordonstoun, where our own headmaster had been as a senior master. This gave shape and discipline to a sometimes precarious early life. His fitness was enhanced not only by playing rugby, but also by working part time jobs in farming, as a leather factory packer and security guard, but probably not helped, for a short time, selling ice cream! His professional working life was spent as a Metallurgical Engineer, Marketing Manager, Export Sales Manager, Implementation Manager and Managing Director of his own company. Thirty five years spent, apparently in a creative desert, raising a family, pursuing a career and helping to pay the bills, probably enriched his experience, because his renaissance, on retirement, realised a hidden creative talent as a writer of prose and poetry. He also enjoys music, with a piano and a fifty-two year old Yamaha FG140 acoustic guitar. He sings bass in three a cappella harmony groups: as a founding member of a mixed voice chamber choir, Fox Valley Voices and barbershop quartets. He is also a member of one of the top barbershop choruses in the UK, Hallmark of Harmony (stage name of the Sheffield Barbershop Harmony Club), who, for the eighth time in 41 years, became UK Champions in 2019. He is also a would be (once upon a time or 'has been') photographer with drawers full of his own history, and an occasional, but lapsed 'film' maker. In his other life, he doubles as a Husband, Father, Grandfather, Brother, Uncle, Cousin, Friend and Family man. What he writes is sometimes autobiographical, often political, sometimes dark and frequently pins his colours to the mast of climate change and how a few humans are trashing the Earth. In 2013, he published an anthology of the poetry (including his own) of an international group of poets, who met on Twitter in 2011. He produced, edited and steered the product of this work, "Petrichor Rising", to publication by Aquillrelle. His sort of strap-line reads: “ iWrite iSing iDance iChi iVolunteer ”
This entry was posted in Death, Fear, poem, poetry. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Phobiaphobia

  1. kkkkaty says:

    I like ” and yet we found our art”….Your covered it all pretty much and the ins & outs and back and forths are effective..

    Like

  2. ” that fear that drives us out of dread, and
    makes us rise from bed each day
    as slaves, not masters, with disabled minds
    for which a simple beauty once held sway.”

    Nothing to fear but fear itself! How well your word choice and form have captured this. Very nicely penned, John!

    Like

  3. brian miller says:

    really interesting take…i guess some fear is not bad if it gets us up and out of bed and moving each day instead of sitting there and letting it waste away….as long as that fear is not what always drives us….i would like to think some positive outcomes do as well…i like how you kinda zoom in and out in this….from the smallest creature to the universe…

    Like

  4. Sabio Lantz says:

    Loved this line:

    so fearful of the Gods, whom we revere
    just so as to fool ourselves that we
    will always have control and never fear

    Like

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